a blog launched to laugh at my own expense

Air Fryers




I have many talents (namely my uncanny ability to buy every single thing Instagram serves me in a targeted ad) but my skills stop at the kitchen’s threshold. I can pour a bowl of cereal and know my way around a microwave, but that is about it. I prefer only to make reservations.

So when a sponsored Instagram post introduced me to an air fryer, I knew I needed one. But since I didn’t want to buy myself one…. I convinced my boyfriend’s mother to give him one for Christmas. Then, on December 26th, 2018, I commandeered his air fryer as my own.



My 2019 resolution was to learn to cook* (*in the air fryer). 6 months into 2019, I can proudly say that I have graduated from the microwave to the air fryer, which has replaced the microwave as my primary source of sustenance.

In college, when I was responsible for making dinner for the house, I would pour everyone a bowl of cereal and then eat five bowls of cereal because no one wanted to eat my prepared meal. BUT NOW all my friends want to come over and behold the air fryer magic!




Still not convinced that air fryers are the best thing available in the infomercial sphere right now? Let me elaborate on why air fryers are the best thing since deep fried twinkies:

1 . Since my favorite type of food is the fried kind, my air fryer allows me to take anything in the grocery store and turn it into the healthy deep-fried alternative version of itself. BUT WITHOUT ADDING ANY OIL. It is literally like magical food science.

2. Gives new life to your take out leftovers. Sometimes I order Uber Eats just so I can put it in my air fryer.



3. Make great wedding gifts. There is nothing more thoughtful than giving someone a gift they didn’t know they wanted.

4. They are a beautiful counter decoration. It's like a Ukrainian Easter egg that sits on your counter all year round.

5.  You end up tricking yourself into eating more vegetables like onion rings and tempura cauliflower.

6. You are #cleaneating because there is little clean up involved with the air fryer. You just wash the basket out and then let it dry. I don’t have personal experience with this part, but I have watched Matty do it multiple times. Since I am the one preparing the meal, I can't also do the dishes.

7. Automatic portion control. I can only fry what I can fit in the basket… for that course at least.




8. Great excuse to get out of outdoor activities like camping or white water rafting. My default excuse is, “Sorry, I can’t go because I can’t bring my air fryer and I don’t want to get hungry”.

9. Owning an air fryer provides default conversations. Run out of things to say at a party? Just talk about your air fryer. This trick works at supermarket checkout lines, sporting matches, and probably funerals.

10. Automatic shut off means my smoke detector gets a break. Normally, I know something is finished toasting because the smoke detector goes off, but now, I don't have to rely on the smoke detector anymore!


Air fryers are literally the best thing to ever happen to my budding career as an expert cooker. I have decided that my Top Chef stage name will be Queen of the Crispy and I am waiting for Ellen DeGeneres to invest in my air fryer restaurant which would be like an air fryer version of Benihana.

My only complaint is that they don’t come in pink.

xo
B

6 comments


  1. INTERNET SCAM ALERT‼️

    The internet today is full of SCAM ADS, mostly in comments of various sites and blogs. A large number of individuals have been victims of scam and lost a lot of money to SCAMMERS. Most of the common scam you can see
    ❌BANK LOAN SCAM. ❌BINARY OPTIONS SCAM.
    ❌LOTTERY SCAM. ❌HACKING SCAM. and lost more......

    ✳️The big Question is “Can someone Recover their money lost to Internet Scam⁉️
    I will say yes, and will tell you how.

    The only way to Recovery your is to hire a Hacker who will help you take back your money from this Scammers and today is your lucky day, you just met the guys perfect for the job.

    WHO ARE WE❔
    We are PYTHONAX, A group of skilled Hackers and have dedicated our time to help individuals get back thier money from INTERNET SCAMMERS. There is a research was carried one to calculate the amount of money lost through Scam, and it was confirmed that more than USD $3billion annually.

    HOW DO WE OPERATE❔
    We first of all study the scammer brought to us by hacking the person device(phone or computer) to get information of How, Where, this person keeps money he/she as defrauded people of ( so many of this scammers don’t actually save the money in banks, they mostly stack the money in a Bitcoin wallet, that way it is safe and untraceable to authorities) and we work on a strategy to get back the money and give it back to whom they have defrauded.

    Contacting us is simple, just give us a message through the email below.
    Email-: PYTHONAX@OUTLOOK.COM

    If you a victim of internet scam or you know someone who is, make contact to us immediately. You are 💯 % safe to contact us, our email is very secure.



    We also provide Legit Hacking Services such as-:
    🔸Phone Hacking/Cloning
    🔸Email Hacking & Password Recovery
    🔸Social Media Hacking & Passowrd Recovery
    🔸Deleted Files Recovery 🔸Mobil Tracking
    🔸Virus detection & Elimination. e.t.c

    Email-: PYTHONAXHACKS@GMAIL.COM




    Pythonax.
    2020 © All Right Reserved.








    ReplyDelete
  2. Awesome article, it was exceptionally helpful! I simply began in this and I'm becoming more acquainted with it better! Cheers, keep doing awesome! Check it out

    ReplyDelete
  3. These things are very important, good think so - I think so too... Best Air Fryer for Family of 6

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is very interesting content! I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your points and have come to the conclusion that you are right about many of them. You are great. How to Use Black and Decker Air Fryer

    ReplyDelete
  5. I exploit solely premium quality products -- you will observe these individuals on: How to Use Instant Vortex Air Fryer

    ReplyDelete
  6. Reduce noise and vibration with a set of anti-vibration pads from RIBI. Multi-purpose application for washing machines dehumidifiers malta

    ReplyDelete